What is Meditation & Why the Heck Do I Need it?

As you read this I would like you to relax your shoulders, wiggle your facial muscles and allow them to fall naturally. Take one breath in and slowly release it. Feel your breath leaving your body. Really feel that sensation of ‘relaxed’. Is it heavy or light? Do your muscles feel tight or loose?

If you’ve never done a mindfulness meditation before, then congratulations, you just did! Not so bad right? See, everyone has a little monk hiding inside of them. Okay that sounds weird. But meditation is remarkably simply with extraordinary results. The scientifically-proven health benefits of meditation are endless and it can improve all aspects of your life from marriage and parenting to financial success and even your career - if you begin to practice it on a regular basis.

But for some reason many people are still not jumping on the meditation bandwagon. When asked, “Why not?” it elicits answers like:

1. I don’t have the time.

2. Meditation can’t help me and my issues.

3. Do I look like some type of hippie-granola-crunching-monk to you?

But the truth is, if more of us knew how much of an impact meditation could make on our lives they would be screaming, “Sign Me Up Hippie!”

So your next question might be, “What is meditation and why the heck do I need it?”

Meditation is a practice of being in focussed awareness and mindfulness. That’s it. It’s quite simple. It has been practiced for over 3,000 years and some ancient wall art in India even suggests it could have been around as early as 5,000BCE. That's a long time.

And did you notice it’s called a ‘practice’? Meditation is skill that can be developed and the more you practice the better you will get. But the biggest obstacle in developing your meditation skill is not learning how to cross your legs like a pretzel or finding the best meditation pillow, it’s how to interrupt the incessant flow of thoughts which seem to prevent us from being in our ‘focussed state of awareness’ during our meditation.

So, while the concept of ‘staying focussed’ seems quite simple, it’s not always easily achievable. In fact it can be downright f*cking frustrating. You see our brains don’t really ever stop thinking. We have about 6,000 ‘thought worms’ a day. (A thought worm being the beginning of every new train of thought.) Our brain is constantly in ‘chatter mode’. Buddha described this perfectly as ‘monkey mind’. Our brains are like drunken monkeys constantly jumping around, flinging themselves from tree to tree, squeaking, chirping and chattering…non-stop. And anyone who has tried to sit quietly for more than twenty-seven seconds knows exactly what I’m talking about.

It is impossible to shut our brains down from the chaotic whirl wind of words and emotions. The misconception of meditation is that we assume that being good at meditation means that we have the ability to train our brains to stop thinking thoughts. This is not the case and is also entirely impossible.

To be successful in meditating you simply have to give your ‘monkey mind’ a job to do. Something to focus on. Kind of the same way you tame an unruly toddler. When you give your brain something to focus on it takes away the ability for the monkey mind to start swinging from tree to tree. But to think we could stay focused continuously, with our thoughts never going astray, would be downright ridiculous. Actually, it’s to be expected. Our minds will wander, it’s only human. The key is to observe when your mind has gone astray and to simply, with no judgement or criticism, just return back to your ‘choice of focus’. Even if that means we do this OVER and OVER and OVER again. This is meditation; the skill of continually switching back to our focus even when the monkey mind starts chattering and swinging.

And it will chatter! Believe me. This is my monkey mind:

“Breathe in…….breathe out……breathe in…....add butter to the grocery list….… breathe out…...breathe in……..I need to check Amazon for a better meditation pillow, something dark to hide the dirt from my dirty floor, but it definitely needs to match my yoga mat… breathe out………..breathe in……...note to self: get hair dye, I’m tired of my toddler telling me I look like Grandma – no offense Grandma – speaking of Grandmas, I really need to call her…..….breathe out……breathe in…breathe out..”

See? Not continually focussed at all and I’ve been meditating for almost a decade. But I’m still benefiting from all the moments in between of ‘breathe in….breathe out’ regardless of how inconsistent they are.

Random things will try to interrupt your focus throughout your whole meditation. And that is just fine. The integral part of meditation is to not judge or scorn or finger wag at your monkey mind. This is not the time for negative scolding. Negativity is kind of the opposite of the tranquil feeling we are trying to achieve so adding this to our wandering mind is simply counter-productive. Plus, negativity will simply just evoke another nagging set of thought worms. So we simply acknowledge the thought and return our focus for as many times as it takes. And the more you do this, the better you will get at it. I promise.

It was once said that meditating is not about getting good at meditating, it’s about getting good at life. And no matter how much you feel you ‘suck at meditation’ I guarantee you will feel better after doing it regardless of how little of focus you’ve had. Our bodies can benefit a great deal from these mindful moments. I have been meditating for years and some days I’m still “horrible at” it. But it has still changed my life. And usually the days that I feel less able to focus, are the days that in fact I need meditation the most.

I started meditating because I had anxiety and insomnia and bit by bit, they seemed to get worse. I would get such bad anxiety while driving that even approaching a green light would make me anxious as I nervously anticipated that it might turn yellow - and what if I did not stop in time? My brain would go into catastrophe mode with every traffic light I came to. But anxiety wasn't just a mental thing in my head - it also became quite physical. I would get such a painful tightening pain in my chest that I literally wanted to call 911 on more than one occasion because I thought I might be having a heart-attack or stroke. And if you have ever suffered from insomnia before - you know that with continual sleep loss you can go from someone who seems relatively sane to a person who starts looking and sounding like they could really seek refuge at their local asylum. So clearly this was effecting my daily life and life was starting to feel like I was simply a prisoner enduring daily torture treatments. I knew something had to change.

I chose not to fill the prescription my doctor had given me and opted to research some natural remedies instead. I knew that even though the medication would take away my symptoms, it would not have gotten to the root cause of my anxiety. With a quick Google search I decided that meditation would be the first thing on my list to try. It required no start-up costs, no monthly fees or subscriptions, no special - fancy outfits, no equipment needed and I could do it all in the comforts of my own home without having to leave my bed if I didn’t want to. I’m no professional sales person here, but really with a list like that anyone would be silly NOT to at least try it.

So with a few YouTube Guided Meditations and some free meditation apps I began a practice that not only helped curb my anxiety AND insomnia but made me feel like a much better person. The results were beyond my expectations. Like, being a much nicer-less-bitchy wife…check; being a more patient-less-likely-to-lose-my-shit kind of mom….check; having the ability to breathe and centre myself when I’ve gone from a slightly irritated human to a crazy-as-f*ck-psycho-pants monster in 3.5 seconds flat…check. Meditation was not only improving the small things in life, but the big things too.

But don’t just take my word for it; even science is proving the health benefits of meditation. It’s no longer some monk-like, hippie, yogi, woo-woo practice. Meditation becoming more mainstream today. It’s a meditation movement and it’s like a legit thing. It’s even recognized in real scientific journals, like written by real doctors with real degrees. No need to feel afraid of the judgments and eye rolls of your fellow neighbors or co-workers…meditation is getting a name for itself in our modern world.

Meditation can improve your mood instantly, your whole day or even your entire life. “Whoa Nelly, I don’t think so” you say? Well, here’s the “NON woo-woo” list of facts and benefits about meditation.

Science says that meditation:

· reduces stress

· controls anxiety

· promotes mental & emotional health

· enhances self-awareness

· increases ability to focus

· can help eliminate or change negative relationships (metta meditations)

· increase empathy & compassion towards self and others

· helps develop or enhance self-control, cravings and addictions

· improves sleep…hallelujah

· decreases blood pressure & lower cholesterol

· reduces & controls pain

· can simply create more happiness in life

So…..do you see something on this list that you or a loved one could benefit from? Well, if the answer is yes then read on for the Meditation 101: A Guidepost for Simple Meditation. And if the answer was no, then please go ahead and send me a sample of whatever Magic Potion you are drinking…providing it’s legal to send in the mail.

So turn your “Monkey Mind” into a “Monk-like Mind”. See what I did there…monkey…monk…brilliant, I know. See meditation can actually make you smarter too…or just awesome at puns.

Happy meditating and good luck taming your Monkey Mind.